AUTHOR3AE25Happy Friday! Hope you all have a splendid weekend. Here’s a couple of jokes to set you up. Bet you don’t guess the endings!

*

Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack’s minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

“I realize it’s terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I’m recently widowed,” she explained. “I’m afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house.”

“Don’t worry,” Jack said. “We’ll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we’ll be gone at first light.” The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.

But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend. He dropped in on his friend, Bob, and asked, “Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?”

“Yes, I do.” Said Bob .

“Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?”

“Well, um, yes!,” Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out,  “I have to admit that I did.”

“And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?”

Bob’s face turned beet red and he said, “Yeah, look, I’m sorry, buddy. I’m afraid I did.” “Why do you ask?”

“She just died and left me everything.”

*

One evening a father overheard his son saying his prayers.

“God bless Mommy, Daddy and Grammy. Goodbye Grampa.”

Well, the father thought it was strange, but he soon forgot about it. The next day, the grandfather died.

A month later the father heard his son saying prayers again.

“God bless Mommy. God bless Daddy. Goodbye Grammy.”

The next day, the grandmother died. Well, the father was getting more than a little worried about the whole situation.

One week later, the father once again overheard his son’s prayers.

“God Bless Mommy. Goodbye Daddy.”

This nearly gave the father a heart attack. He didn’t say anything but he got up early to go to work, so that he would miss the traffic. He stayed at work all through lunch and dinner.  Finally, after midnight, he returned home. He was still alive!   When he got home he apologised to his wife. “I am sorry, Honey. I had a very bad day at work today.”

“You think you’ve had a bad day? You think you’ve had a bad day?” His wife yelled, “The mailman dropped dead on my doorstep this morning!”

*

Advertisements