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IMG_0870It’s Friday and here are a few jokes to start your weekend with a smile.

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A farmer’s pal walks into his shed and catches the farmer doing a striptease in front of the machinery. The pal says: “What the hell are you at?”

The farmer goes red and tells his friend: “Well, I might as well tell you the truth. I haven’t been getting on that well with the wife lately so I went to a therapist, and she told me to do something sexy to a tractor.”

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A man walks into a pet store to buy a parrot, and he sees three next to each other.

He goes up to the cashier and says: “How much for the first parrot on the left?” and the cashier replies: “€2,000.” The man gasps: “€2000! What can it do for that price?”

The cashier says: “It can write and take notes.”

The man nods and asks the price of another parrot, and he’s shocked when it’s €5,000.

“€5,000” What the hell can that one do?”

“Oh that one can send emails.”

The man replies: “Ok, how about the last one?”

“The last one? €10,000.”

The man’s jaw drops and he says again: “What can that one do?” and the pet store owner shrugs and says: “I don’t have a clue but the other two call him boss.”

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My son’s been asking me for a pet spider for his birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were £70!!!
Too expensive, I thought. I can get one cheaper off the web.

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Good luck to all of you who are now beginning NaNoWriMo. Have a productive weekend. Here’s one just for you:

Joe’s mother was a writer.  She’d never published anything, but she loved nothing more than to sit down at a keyboard and pour her dear heart out onto the page.

Trouble was, her keyboard was attached to an old manual typewriter.  The kind you see displayed in the window of an antique store.

Joe finally persuaded her to learn the most rudimentary functionality of a computer, using MS Word.  She agreed, and before long she was using Google to research her ideas, Outlook to kibitz with her friends on email, and, much to Joe’s surprise, soon had a Facebook page and was a frequent tweeter.

One day she asked Joe for some help getting on line.  And that’s when he discovered the password she’d been using for all her new online pursuits.

It was this: “MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy.”

When he could speak again, Joe asked his mother why she’d chosen what was just possibly the world’s longest password.

Her response: “Well, they said it needed to be at least eight characters long, and I couldn’t remember all the names from the Brady Bunch.”

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